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Does anything really matter to you or to me? You know I didn’t aspire to be a motivational speaker, writer or what have you. Yes – I want my words to be a positive influence but I also want them to mean something beyond me - by making a difference. My words, along with my actions and not how they might be perceived, interpreted or rather misinterpreted. But it’s also tough when many of my actions are actually anticipatory re-actions. Instigated by the misdeeds of others which seem always silently involved through waves of interferences invisibly directing from behind the scenes. So telling my own story though difficult: is important to me because words are very important to me…
Because of wanting to inform others I’m determined more than ever to focus on my writing skills. They have kept me on the straight and narrow while relaying all of these small daily scripted episodes. I feel compelled to do this because of these same dark forces targeting my peace. Suddenly the legal word ”intent” pops into my head when I think too much about it. Like when all this psuedo-lawful intent turned criminal and although I don’t remember where the idea came to me from. I’m thinking it might have been from reading the “Constitution” or the "Bill of Rights” or something during my research. All this shadowy cloak and dagger sneaky stuff is illegal you know? But if they’re real good, then you have to be real tip-top aware of your surroundings and everything. Anyway that’s how I interpreted it and how I’m influenced to write about it. And all this stuff about rights - luckily I already did something about it or I’d be here wanting to preach about doing it again.
And the fact is – I truly believe that almost all of us deep-down yearn to matter. Like the prophetic songs I used to write about mankind because it was always about bigger things than myself. I don’t just want everything to be about me or without reason. Not just to survive, but to survive for a significant relevance beyond our own physicality of existences. Although I’ve been hearing the word “legacy” a lot lately in my close circles as well as everywhere else; In history, we only need our presences to echo - now that means something greater has to resonate! So my polished philosophical words must magically reach out for and beyond me. I know we don’t all define ambitions or achievement the same but more and more lately people seem to be confronting the extents of all our normalities, as in ideas about leaving something permanent behind. As monuments to our personal historic proofs that “I was here!”
All our ideas, judgments, justices, liberty, pursuits - something permanent for the history books. While I’m here too, it’s not out of arrogance; I want to do my humble bit like everyone else. And this time I suppose it seems always the same as the last time only different than everyone else; I think everyone wants the differences… cause it matters to almost all of us! To everyone just this alone gives us a sense of fulfillment. Mattering to me however has to do with what so many before me wanted – “freedom justice.” But the justice that I’m looking for has to do with the same equivalence so many of our country’s founding fathers were imagining and fighting for so many years ago. Yes, I’m talking about the dream state, of freedom for all of us.
---Written by the author Robert Torres (2024)
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